Thursday, December 22, 2011

talking to a five-year-old about hockey

Oh my god, who is responsible for these three-day breaks between games? I realize that it's really nice that we have an actual season, unlike the NFL or something--16 games is what real men consider "warming up", sorry--but still, the days when 7:00 rolls around and there are no Caps games are the worst days. In lieu of actual news happening, here is a conversation I had with five-year-old Rylan this morning about Ovechkin, the Caps, and hockey in general.

What do you think about hockey?
I'm good at hockey.

What's your favorite part?
The hockey part.

Who do you like best?
The red team. Not the white ones. Those are the bad guys.

-I show him this picture-

What do you think about this guy?
He looks nice. He looks like a firefighter. -looks at him closer.- He had some teeth come out like me. He needs to put them under his pillow.

So the tooth fairy will come?

-I show him The Goal-

Wow! -followed by a lot more "wow!"- we watch it twice-
-Wayne Gretzky is shown onscreen- That looks like my mom!

How did he do that?
He fell on his back!

Was that cool? 
Yeah. I think I could do that.

-I show him this picture-

What do you think about these guys?
Those are cowboys. -good job, Caps marketing-
They're hockey players! They're on my team.

Who's that guy? -points to Semin-
That's Alex Semin! He's good at hockey but he's silly sometimes. 
He's my favorite. Is he the guy who did the thing we watched?
No that was this guy. -point to Ovechkin-
He's cool and fast.

-I show him this picture-

What do you think about this guy? 
Is that a good guy or bad guy?

Bad guy. 
I don't think about him.

You don't think about him at all?
No, because he's the bad guy. That guy is not on the red team. He's on the black team. I want to see the other guy.

This guy? -I go back to the Ovechkin picture-
No, the guy I like.

Alex Semin?
Yeah. He's my favorite.

-I show him the weagle-

What does this look like, Rylan?
An evil thing.

An evil thing? Do you know what it is?
A bat. It's scary.

Do you think that it's scarier than this? -I show him him the Sharks logo-
Yeah, I think it would eat the shark.

So there you have it. Pretty good instincts, definitely a future hockey fan.

We're working on it.

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